The arrival of Christmas

Sleep is a blessing. Because at 12.30 after dropping off the last emails I fell into a deep, deep sleep. Entirely different from the night before…

Thursday 9 am in taxi on my way to Hoorn
I never got to to sleep. As Jacques de Molay was burning on a stake on the Ile de la Cite,  morning was approaching. It was my worst night, as I was batteling with my mind to go to sleep. R believes if I can set my mind on anything, I can do it with sleeping too. But it doesn’t exactly work like that. It only made me more agitated. I cried, I cursed and in between I read my book about the rise and fall of the Knights Templar. I’m almost finished. If anything, it gave me resolve as their less than heroic demise seemed rather poignant to my own situation. Miles apart but  at 5 am leaps become steps and steps becomes vast distances ready to be conquered.
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Today, Friday 10.19 on the train
Yesterday Victoria had her Christmas dinner. We all went to her school where they were singing carols and drinking gluhwein. Christmas really hit me. Like a cold slap on the cheek from the icy winds, carrying snow flakes with them. I stood there, freezing to the bone, but finally slowing down. Christmas is about family, traditions, spending time with those close to you. As I see the houses being lit up with candles, Christmas tree and yuletide decorations, I can’t help but feeling envious. They know how to put family and traditions before work and duty. I realize I have a lot to learn. But this weekend will mark the beginning to our own Christmas countdown. This weekend Caroline is coming over to Christmas clean the whole place. I will polish the silver, clean the christal and make orange decorations to be hung in the window together with Victoria. We will get the tree, a 3 meter tree to match our high ceilings and dust off the season decorations. Christmas is about to arrive to our home!