Fracas Noir – Susanne Waldau – te Brake ~ for better or worse

Rush for the train, it’s already 9.30 and I was hoping to be in the office already by now. Nothing I can do about it. I grab a newspaper, but don’t get the time to read it as another train emerges around the curve. Another day, another Monday and a new week. I feel like [...]

I have been working on a new sentence for the past 10 minutes. It doesn’t come to me. I know what I want to write, and yet there is a block. The freedom of writing is not there. Instead I feel suffocated. The morning started out well…happy, relaxed I’ve spent the past two hours researching [...]

Yesterday I sit on the train from Amsterdam to Haarlem. I feel crap. Perhaps it’s my period. It came back with a vengence. It’s like my nesting period with Sebastian is all over. Now it’s work, work, work. I start to write for the blog, but it’s all so negative, bad, painful. But I keep [...]

I’m sitting in our dining room, absolutely freezing. It’s been pouring with rain all morning, which in a way is rather cosy when you are doing a mini-brainstorm with yourself. Better that that glorious sunshine that only distracts me I suppose. I’m nursing on my third cup of coffee this morning, as I’m still too [...]

There is something said for working in an all male environment. Apart from the obvious (I shall refrain from getting into that one with the risk of being accused of sexual harassment), it can be rather useful when you want advice on the topic of men. Last Friday, I queried one one of my colleagues [...]

My life appears to be in a constant flux. I live with no real aim, and goals I set up changes day by day.  Decisions I want to take has to be postponed. I hear my spouse saying “What decisions?”.  It’s funny how two people living under the same roof see things so differently. They [...]

I wake up in a cold sweat. It’s light and I’m disoriented. I look to my right. Reinout is sleeping on his side, face away from me. I  avoid the alarm clock. I fear I’ve woken up only half an hour away from my usual wake up time. Finally I manage to drift asleep again, [...]

The alarm clock is staring back at me, as to remind me that it will go off in exactly 5 hours and 9 minutes. It makes me tired just thinking of it. I’m chasing sleep right now. Every little minute extra I can get out of it, without compromising my daytime. It’s been busy, and [...]

I’m not a morning person, not any longer. I wake up at 6.30 to make the most of my day, then hit the gym at 7 for a 45 min power work out. Still when I come home I’m tired, that’s when I go for my first coffee fix. It helps somewhat but the heaviness [...]